क्या Self-Neglect हमें धीरे-धीरे खत्म कर रहा है?




क्या Self-Neglect हमें धीरे-धीरे खत्म कर रहा है?

(Thought-provoking और आज के common search queries जैसे self-destruction और mental health से जुड़ा विषय)

The Event…

कुछ समय पहले मैंने अपने brother-in-law टुनटुन को खो दिया। वह 60 के पार थे, हाल ही में retire हुए थे, और बाहर से बेहद lively लगते थे। Kind, helpful, and always supporting others—ऐसे इंसान जिन पर हर कोई depend करता था। लेकिन उनकी मुस्कान के पीछे एक deep disregard for his own needs छिपी थी। व हमेशा खुद से ज़्यादा दूसरों की care करते थे। अब जब मैं उनकी life पर सोचता हूँ, तो समझ आता है कि वह एक hidden psychological script के तहत जी रहे थे—  "I am not important."

शुरुआत में यह सोच harmless लग सकती है। लेकिन personal experience और scientific research बताती है कि यह मानसिकता इंसान की physical और mental health को धीरे-धीरे खत्म कर सकती है।

क्या ‘I am not important’ की सोच सच में घातक साबित हो सकती है? It seems,
Yes, it can. Atleast, data suggest so....

1. “I Am Not Important” Script – A Silent Killer?

Transactional Analysis के तहत Dr. Eric Berne ने life scripts की अवधारणा प्रस्तुत की थी—childhood में develop होने वाले unconscious patterns जो हमारी पूरी life को प्रभावित करते हैं।  Yeh एक common script है—. “I am not important.”  ऐसे लोग मानते हैं कि उनके thoughts, emotions, और well-being दूसरों के मुकाबले less significant हैं।

 Aise log अक्सर tireless caregivers बन जाते हैं, दूसरों को please करने में लगे रहते हैं, और अपनी feelings suppress कर लेते हैं।  मेरे brother-in-law भी ऐसे ही थे। वह अपने late father को बहुत idealize करते थे और अक्सर अपनी voice को दबा देते थे।  कभी भी “No” नहीं कहते थे, चाहे कितना भी exhausted हो जाएँ। हर किसी की help को तैयार रहते थे, लेकिन self-care और personal growth पर कभी ध्यान नहीं दिया।  इस हद तक self-neglect ने उनकी health को अंदर से धीरे-धीरे damage कर दिया।  यह सिर्फ एक personal story नहीं है, बल्कि यह एक deep-rooted psychological issue है, जिसे identify करना बेहद ज़रूरी है।


2. Scientific Research Confirms – Self-Neglect Can Be Fatal

Can self-neglect actually shorten one’s lifespan?
Yes, and science proves it.

1️⃣ Chronic Stress & Cortisol Overload

जो लोग खुद को less important मानते हैं, वे अक्सर chronic stress का शिकार होते हैं। इसका परिणाम होता है cortisol (stress hormone) का बढ़ा हुआ स्तर, जिससे:

  • Weakened immunity

  • High blood pressure

  • Increased inflammation

  • Cardiovascular disease

  • Dr. Bruce McEwen ने अपने neuroendocrinology research में बताया कि prolonged stress की वजह से heart attacks, strokes, और memory loss की संभावना बढ़ जाती है।


2️⃣ Learned Helplessness & Hopelessness

Dr. Martin Seligman के अनुसार, कई लोग बार-बार ऐसी परिस्थितियों का सामना करते हैं जहाँ वे खुद को helpless महसूस करते हैं। धीरे-धीरे यह mindset develop हो जाती है कि “There’s no point in seeking help.”

और इसका परिणाम होता है:

  • Avoidance of medical care

  • Suppressed emotions

  • Higher risk of depression और suicide

3️⃣ Loneliness & Social Isolation

A startling study (Holt-Lunstad et al., 2015) में पाया गया कि loneliness और emotional isolation से premature death risk 26% तक बढ़ जाता है—
जो smoking 15 cigarettes per day जितना नुकसान कर सकता है!


4. How to Break the “I Am Not Important” Script?

✅ 1. Start Saying “I Matter” – Because You Do!

Yah कोई superficial affirmations नहीं—बस एक solid step। You need to always lSay it to yourself: “I AM IMPORTANT.”इसे write करें। Say iot aloud। Let it sink in.

✅ 2. Take Care of the Basics – Health Comes First and foremost that,

  • Regular health check-ups करवाएँ

  • Eat nutritious food—क्योंकि आपका body सही fuel चाहता है

  • Prioritize sleep—क्योंकि खराब sleep habits आपको अंदर से weaken कर सकती हैं

  • Take breaks without guilt—self-care कोई luxury नहीं, बल्कि essential है

✅ 3. Express Your Feelings – Bottling Them Up Is Dangerous

Suppressing emotions से इंसान stronger नहीं बनता—बल्कि internally damage होता है। So, Talk to someone। Write your thoughts।

✅ 4. Say “No” Without Over-Apologizing

हर चीज़ के लिए “Yes” कहना सिर्फ drains your energy। So,
“No” कहना सीखिए—और उसे बिना extra explanation के छोड़ दीजिए।

🔥 Conclusion: Self-Respect Is Self-Preservation

Tuntun की story सिर्फ एक personal memory नहीं, यह हम सबके लिए warning है।
खुद की neglect करना sacrifice नहीं—बल्कि dangerous है।  Life सिर्फ दूसरों की service के लिए नहीं—अपने लिए भी priority दें।

Mind that You are important and so...Make sure that your mind & body never forget that.



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